Learning to Recover: How Overcoming Perfectionism Changed My Growth

“Christine, recover." This was a statement that my coach reiterated during practice and games.

You may wonder what I needed to recover from. Let’s take a pause.

Perception and Perfection

For the longest time, I lived with a deep fear of perception. Perfect score. Perfect character. Perfect behavior. Perfect personality. Perfect everything. 

Is it wrong to strive for perfection? Is it wrong to want to be perfect at the expense of everything else? Lost opportunities. Lost chances. Just because it didn’t seem like the perfect time. 

You may have found yourself in such a situation. Maybe not you, but someone that you know. For me, this extended beyond the classroom. It included the sports field.

Stepping Onto the Court

I started playing basketball sometime in 2022. Here, I stepped out of my comfort zone to try out a sport that I had admired for years but never had the courage to pursue. 

But every time I was on the court, my perfectionist self wasn’t okay with making mistakes. When a bad crossover lets the opponent take the ball, my disappointment would set in immediately. Why would I make the mistake at that particular time? Why didn’t I take precautions? 

All these questions would come up every time something didn’t go my way. The time spent thinking about these questions would take away from my ability to focus on the game. It would consume me inwardly, leading to even more distractions.

Realization: The Need to Recover

It was in this space that I identified this weakness, which prevented me from being excellent. I vowed to myself that I’d work on it. It was not as easy as they made it seem. It required a lot of intentionality. 

I needed to recover. 

By taking small steps, I gave myself grace during the game and practice. When I lost possession of the ball or wasn’t able to do what I wanted to, I did not flood my mind with the what-ifs. Instead, I quickly got back on track and recovered. 

Ripple effect

This translated to other areas of my life outside basketball. Yes, I had to deliver excellent work. When it didn’t turn out that way, I took the lessons and pivoted if needed. 

I tried out different things for the first time. Some worked out, some didn’t. But all in all, I'm glad that I tried it out.

Gradually, my fear of perception was dissipating. It’s not that I felt the same at all times. But I still chose to move on. Sports, particularly basketball, allowed me to identify a weakness and work on it. Looking back, I am glad that I came to this realization.

The Art of Recovering

Sports have a way of allowing one to know oneself better. You can see your strengths and weaknesses. You work with different people and pick up different lessons. All in all, you get a chance to be better than you were before.

Just as my coach reiterated my need to recover, I’m glad that this remains deeply etched in me. It always serves as a reminder for me to get up when I’m down and take up opportunities even when it feels like it is not the perfect time.

Indeed, Christine learnt the art of recovering.

SHE Centre is here to help you.

Find your community at SHE Space. You were never meant to do this alone.

Under the SHE Journey Shelf, find downloadable resources and tune into The SHE Podcast to find yourself in someone else’s story.

Connect with our partner organizations who are ready to walk alongside you in this season.

Author: Christine Kabiru